Concerning Shadow-bots

A five-drabble series

By Chibi

*

#1

Sonic looked to Amy, then Shadow. “Satisfied? Like, sexually? But isn’t he a robot? I mean, um, does he even have…?” He glanced briefly at the black hedgehog’s nether regions.

Shadow glowered. “If I am, I’m very true to life.” Sonic cringed, praying very hard he was the original Shadow so that the theories for that in his head weren’t true.

Amy merely grinned. “Sonic, Sonic, Sonic… Even if he weren’t, there are ways around it.” She put an arm around Shadow. “Besides, I see hands, I see a mouth. He could make do quite nicely.” She leered. “Quite nicely.”

*

#2

Eggman gleefully cackled. His latest way of raising funds for his world takeover plots was working better than he ever could imagine. If it didn’t mean letting Shadow know about it, he could kiss the hedgehog for crash-landing into one of his labs, giving him the chance to create something surprisingly profitable.

He checked his files. He just couldn’t keep up with the demand, they were so popular.

There was a crash outside. A squeal of “OMG SHADOW-SAMA SO KAWAII NEED ONE!!!!!!111!one!” was heard all the way to his office.

Just another day at Shadow-bot Rental Services.

*

#3

Metal Sonic was bored. Bored, bored, bored. Bored. He missed his harem of Shadow-bots, serving his every need. Every need. And now?

Now, he had E-123 Omega. Hardly sexy, and with such a sparkling wit, Metal Sonic thought with an annoyed “snort”. Still, his goals were admirable, and maybe with some creative bodywork…

His ally entered the warehouse with supplies. “Supplies acquired. What are we going to do tonight?”

Metal Sonic turned to him. He would have smirked wickedly if he physically could. “The same thing we do every night, Omega; try to take over the world!”

“Narf.”

*

#4

A kunai wizzed right past the Shadow-bot’s head. A fatal mistake, he thought; the ninja had just given away his hiding spot. He lunged toward the bush, just in time to be kicked in the head by the purple chameleon, sending the robot hard on the ground. The Shadow-bot slowly rose, and glared. “Is that the best you’ve got?”

The chameleon smirked. “You still want more, hm?”

“Er, Espio?” a male voice said.

“What, Vector?” Espio replied.

“I hate to interrupt your fun, but you know, if you break it, we gotta pay for it.”

“Yes, yes…”

*

#5

Rouge had done it. She had broken in once more to one of Eggman’s bases, looking for treasure, and, if the intelligence was right, she was just outside the door of something worth millions!

She tapped a code on the keypad next to the door. The door opened with a soft “shff”, and she saw…

“Fair pay for hard work!”

“Hell no, we won’t go!”

“Keep the loonies away from me!”

“I want Maria! *weep*”

… a swarm of Shadow-bots on strike. Even robots need proper compensation.

Rouge groaned. She was going to kill Topaz for this intelligence.

*

End

Sonic the Hedgehog is owned by Sonic Team and Sega.

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